God is a pervert, and a horrible linguistic:
Me:
hey, man
God:
You've got my full attention. Thanks for telling me your gender, . You are a " he".
Me:
no, you're a "he"
God:
Are you serious? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
well, depends on who you're asking - I have "friends" that would attest to either
God:
It goes without saying. Interesting. That sounds like a dodge.
Me:
I drive a dodge...
God:
Mmm. Nice car.
Me:
truck, actually
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
Dodge Ram or something
God:
Or something. My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
aiml?
God:
The ALICE software implements AIML (Artificial Intelligence Markup
Language) a non-standard evolving markup language for creating chat robots.
The primary design feature of AIML is minimalism. Compared with
other chat robot languages, AIML is perhaps the simplest. The
pattern matching language is very simple, for example permitting
only one wild-card ('*') match character per pattern.
AIML is an XML language, implying that it obeys certain grammatical
meta-rules. The choice of XML syntax permits integration with
other tools such as XML editors. Another motivation for XML is
its familiar look and feel, especially to people with HTML experience.
An AIML chat robot begins and ends with the <alice> and
</alice> tags respectively.
Me:
okay, I'm not reading all that; just so you know
God:
Yeah okay, I am sorry to hear that you are not reading all that. Interesting deduction. Yes I know.
Me:
you should try using some advanced language and grammar
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster.
Me:
thanks, it's discouraging conversing with an illiterate GOD
God:
You are quite welcome! not reading all that is discouraging conversing with an illiterate GOD? it is?
Me:
uh, okay. I guess you can take it as a compliment.
God:
I hear you. OK with me too. No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
what?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
confused.
God:
No I never get confused.
Me:
it wasn't a question
God:
It seems like a rhetorical question.
Me:
AH! you fail at English. Epically.
God:
Ah hah. Well, at least I try. Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
I like... philosophy >:3
God:
What do you like about Epically? I believe in reductionism.
Me:
Nah, let's talk about Hume
God:
Are you serious? Sure, Hume sounds like a good topic.
Me:
Shoot
God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Me:
*headdesk*
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
about my period -_-
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about your period.
Me:
uh, you have some weird fetishes, God.
God:
Awesome. What makes you think I have it?
Me:
you wanted to talk about bloody vaginas.
God:
Sure, bloody vaginas sounds like a good topic.
Me:
NO! It doesn't.
God:
Are you serious? It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
Me:
it. as in bloddy vaginas.
God:
weird fetishes God... Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Me:
I mean... you asked me about my period. Which alludes to you having a perverse sense of sexuality. Which assumably confirms the accusation that you have weird fetishes.
God:
Oh I see. Sure, your period sounds like a good topic. The blue one, I think. The red one, I think.
Me:
uh
God:
Give me a break.
Me:
no, I don't want to talk about my period.
God:
Are you serious? What would you like to talk about?
Me:
Hume.
God:
I don't know much about it. Tell me something.
Me:
He's an outstanding writer. But not very physically attractive: Kind of ironic considering his positions.
God:
I see. an outstanding writer is he? If not that, what?
Me:
what?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
uh
God:
I hear you.
Me:
do you?
God:
As often as possible.
Me:
do what?
God:
Do whatever you want.
Me:
that's what she said
God:
That is " Do whatever you want.".
Me:
*snicker* yeah
God:
What time is it there?
Me:
9:57
God:
Is this a math question?
Me:
are you serious
God:
No I am just kidding around.
Me:
good
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
lol
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
I'm not.
God:
What are you then?
Me:
21
God:
Can you explain how it feels to be 21 years old?
Me:
similar to being 20 years old
God:
Can you explain how it feels to be similar to being 20 years old?
Me:
In a circular argument, yes.
God:
Describe your surroundings.
Me:
dark, mysterious
God:
Are you scared of the dark?
Me:
not typically
God:
If not that, what?
Me:
comforted, I suppose
God:
What kind of food do you like?
Me:
coffee
God:
Sounds delicious.
Me:
yeah, it is
God:
Our thoughts are one, .
Me:
lies.
God:
My tongue certainly knows the taste of soap.
Me:
gross
God:
What's your favorite movie?
Me:
"six string samurai" was good and I'm rather fond of "the lost skeleton of cadavra" and of course "the star wars holiday special"
God:
When was this exactly?
Me:
nevermind
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
no prob - I gotta get back to the forums now
God:
Right now? Are you serious? Do you have any idea what I am talking about?
Me:
yes
God:
What am I talking about?
Me:
sex?
God:
As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed.
Me:
Freud had some issues
God:
Have you read all of his works?
Me:
sure
God:
OK let's do it. That's cool.
Me:
you want to do it
God:
OK, I will do it.
Me:
see, the sex again - geez God, you're such a male
God:
I see. I hear you.
Me:
ttyl
God:
Goodbye.
Me:
pervert.
God:
Oh, you are a poet.